Purée coriander, cumin, fennel, nutmeg, turmeric, cloves, cardamom, chilies, candlenuts, garlic, shallots, ginger with 2 tablespoons of water in a food processor. Set aside.
Heat oil in a 12” skillet over medium-high heat and cook the pureed spices with kaffir lime leaves, cinnamon, and lemongrass until golden, about 5–7 minutes.
Stir in half the milk and 1¼ cups water and boil. Reduce heat to medium and cook, while stirring, until tender, about 10–12 minutes.
Stir in remaining milk and salt. Cook until slightly thick, 2 minutes more.